Confidence

Just finish watching 樱野3加1. It is one of the few drama/movie that i actually can learn something out of it. There's a few thing that it enlightened me on, but the most important is Confidence.

Before 20, April 2008, i always think that confident is needed to do things and do things well. I need to be confident to perform in a basketball match, to do an excellent presentation, to make friends and etc. Little did i know, actually confident is about everything. EVERYTHING.

For example, a friend once said i can't manage my people well. If i'm confident enough, i would have just listen, label it as rubbish, and delete it permanently from my memory. But instead, i took his words, and stabbed it at my heart, pull it out and stabbed it again and again. Keeps questioning my own leadership and the way i do things. "Am i not good enough for the role of a leader? Or is there something i did that make him say this?" These questions keeps haunting me for days.

But now, i would think of Confidence as a Role-playing game. Words can be sharp and piercing to mind at times, therefore i call it Weapon. Things that happened or is happening can affect more than a single soul, thus i look at it as Magic. Confidence as our defense against both.

When the damage is dealt, how much it affects you depends greatly on how confident you are.

1. If you are not really sure of yourself, you will suffer great or even full damage intended or accidentally dealt (refers to careless words from others who do not intend to offend).
   
   Fighting mobs that deals great damage gives you more experience. But takes lots of time needed for healing of wounds. One can learn most when great damage is dealt by words or circumstances, but you can feel depress or down for a rather long period of time due to lack of confident.
   
   
2. If you have enough confident, you can take less or no damage.
   
   Fighting mobs that deals relatively low damage allows you to level up faster and little or less healing needed. When you are quite confident of yourself, you listen and see, filter away what you think is wrong or already knew, absorb what is left and carry on with life.
   
   
3. Over confidence result in no damage receive, but most of the time prevent yourself from learning your own mistake.
   
   Fighting mobs that do not deal damage to you normally do not give you any experience. When one is over confident, he normally will not think there's much to learn. He thinks he already knew.
   

Now that i explained how confidence aid in defending yourself, it can actually be offensive. For example when you're giving a speech, you can only convince your audience if you can convince yourself. To do so you need to inject some confidence into your words. For a promoter to successfully sell his product, he have to punch some confidence into his customer. As a leader, one must be sure of himself and decision he make by enhancing his words and action with confidence.

In conclusion, if one has no confident in himself, he really cannot do anything. Even if he does something, it will probably fail.

Although i maybe have realise the importance of confidence, but to regain my long lost confident, i still am not sure how. Hope I can retrieve it back soon... Real soon...